Have you ever had to deal with someone that for no good reason is just never happy. Oh, they pretend to be happy but if you look it’s a facade and you can tell there is no true joy. Even worse than that, they are obviously angry and it’s easy to see since they are continuously not only quick to complain about almost everyone and everything if not absolutely everyone and everything. But not only are they trying to find any excuse to complain about things they almost immediately go from complaining about others but they attack them. Spreading half truths, outright lies and saying vile things about them. And, when they are doing all that, creating chaos and drama that they seem to thrive. Only being happy themselves when they are hurting others and causing them to be unhappy. Doing all they can to try to harass others and spread misery.

11 Speak not evil one of another, brethren. He that speaketh evil of his brother, and judgeth his brother, speaketh evil of the law, and judgeth the law: but if thou judge the law, thou art not a doer of the law, but a judge.
12 There is one lawgiver, who is able to save and to destroy: who art thou that judgest another?

James 4:11-12

When one reviews the psychiatry and psychology literature it becomes obvious that those who behave that way are actually trying to project the feelings they have about themselves onto others. They feel badly about themselves and want to make others feel badly too, so that they feel “normal” because they think “if everyone else is miserable like me, I am mostly normal, and if I was the cause of the misery, then I have some power in life over others.” The individuals are filled with self hate, self loathing, low self esteem and the only way they can feel a sense of self worth is through trying to hurt others and make them feel badly. It is truly sad that one has that mindset, but there are a lot of people out there that are exactly that way. Finding joy in others sorrow and feeling sad if they realize others have any joy. They feel no remorse when they mistreat others, instead feeling or at least acting like, it is their personal right to do such.

How does one help someone like that? Can they be helped? Sadly, most are narcissistic to one extent or another and they justify their actions as their right that supersedes the rights of others. The literally have no regard for others but can do a great job pretending to be concerned and can at times be quite charming when they feel they have something to gain from someone and they believe that behavior will help them so at times, will say nice things to make another feel good about themselves, but that is usually short lived and once they decide another person is not beneficial to them, they will attack, and attack ruthlessly. Which takes us back to the way that some will complain and attack others. But, the bottom line for those people is that they hate themselves, try to use others to validate themselves and in other ways use people to try to help their own self esteem.

12 But what I do, that I will do, that I may cut off occasion from them which desire occasion; that wherein they glory, they may be found even as we.

13 For such are false apostles, deceitful workers, transforming themselves into the apostles of Christ.

14 And no marvel; for Satan himself is transformed into an angel of light.

15 Therefore it is no great thing if his ministers also be transformed as the ministers of righteousness; whose end shall be according to their works.

2 Corinthians 11:12-15

If having some sort of “crisis” where they express doubts and concerns to people, ask for help, ask what is wrong, etc, and the person tries to help them by telling them what they have observed, then they attack that person as well.

He that refuseth instruction despiseth his own soul: but he that heareth reproof getteth understanding.  Proverbs 15:32

Sadly, these people can be subtle how they do things, sometimes, not so subtle, but when that pattern of behavior is observed, be cautious and realize that you can pray for them, but that they often will deny they are wrong so feel they have no reason to talk to God about anything. But, one continues to pray with the hope that God works in that person’s life.

Lord, I praise Your name and worship you for Your majesty. Thank You for the blessings and life lessons that helps me to improve my walk with You and makes my life better. I pray in the name of Jesus that You continue to help me see and understand others better and how to deal with those that behave in negative manner so I can avoid getting trapped in difficult circumstances or caught up in the drama that some try to create. I ask that You reach those who are that way and show them Your truth and work in their hearts that the do right by You and others. I pray that You draw my loved ones to You and show them how to receive the forgiveness and mercy that You offer.

Amen.

I appreciate those who take the time to visit my blog and read my posts. I hope all are having a blessed Christmas season and are able to be a blessing to others as well.

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